I sat in the front row of the local Think, Drive – Stay Alive event listening to the speaker share his life’s story.  As he spoke, he was laying a trail of papers that snaked all around the stage representing the rap sheet of his convictions starting from when he was a teenager through well into his adult life. Thirty-seven convictions total, all directly related to his drug addiction.  

Naturally, his choices led to one family loss after another and had a huge impact on his wife and their children.  As I listened, all I could think was, “how am I ever going to make an impact on this audience after this man’s powerful story?  Why would these kids ever listen to me?” 

A few minutes later, I was on the same stage as the other speakers whose lives had been forever changed as a result of drugs or alcohol. Our mission that day was to encourage the high school students in attendance and others listening to the radio to make responsible choices.  Our hope was that by seeing the consequences of other’s bad decisions, they would be inspired to make good choices.  We wanted to help those listening to avoid having to mourn the death of a loved one or spend years in prison due to addiction as was relayed in the stories shared from the stage. 

It was my first foray into public speaking as a life coach and looking back at it today, I realize that my speech wasn’t bad. Sure, the presentation could have been smoother. I could have spoken with more confidence and authority no doubt, but the message was spot on. 

In hindsight, I realize that the best thing I did was focus on the positive by helping them to create a vision of what their best life could be like.  I guided them through how the choices they make can help them get that life instead of spending my time talking about all the things they shouldn’t do. Focusing on what we don’t want never gets us what we do want, does it? 

So here I am, two years later realizing that I was giving my first speech on Living Your More well before I knew that would be my brand one day. But that is what makes my story so incredible to me.  Back then, I had a plan and was so focused on making it happen in exactly the way I thought it would that I didn’t see the clues God was giving me about the direction he was leading me.  

When invited to present at that event, I really had to stretch my imagination to figure out how giving a talk about making choices to a group of high school kids related to health coaching. I’m glad I didn’t let the fact that it didn’t make sense stop me from moving forward.  There was a time when I would have talked myself out of it. I would have let the fear of speaking on stage, much less on the radio, keep me from saying yes to that invitation.  

I mean, it was more than a little intimidating. And as I sat there right before going on stage questioning my sanity, a part of me wanted to throw my whole presentation out the window and talk about something entirely different than what I had planned.  

Fear will do that, you know.  It will make you think everything you have prepared is wrong.  That you aren’t nearly qualified to give that speech, or take that assignment, or give your witness. It will make you believe things about yourself that aren’t true. 

Do you do that, too?  Do you self doubt yourself out of doing anything that is outside your comfort zone? 

Sadly, we’ve been programmed to fear anything that is new to us. To avoid taking any risk because we might fail. To say no unless we are absolutely sure we can do it perfectly.  

The problem is, to get that thing we really want in life almost always requires us to step outside the area we are most comfortable with.  And given the choice, we almost always will choose the path of least resistance or the path that doesn’t make us uncomfortable. I adopted a saying years ago that said, “God didn’t say it would be easy, He said it would be worth it.” I had no idea how true that little saying is.  

An example of what that looked like in my recent past is reflected when I decided to retire and go into coaching. To do so I took a pretty big financial hit to our household income to step into the completely unknown world of entrepreneurship.  And honestly, I wrestled with the idea for months with myself before I even broached the subject with my husband.  Believe me, he was not crazy about the idea because it would risk everything we had planned for our future.  But God had planted that seed in my heart and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.    

In the process of getting my coaching certifications, I’ve made some significant investments in my education.  Even though I knew that I was being called to make the change, it was a scary prospect, but I knew I had to take that step in faith.  Despite the fear, I felt called to trust that God would not let me fail.  

I love how James Wedmore framed it for me recently in his podcast. He basically said the only way we can succeed is to believe in ourselves enough to keep trying until we do succeed. The only way we fail is when we give up.  Thank goodness I have some amazing people in my life who help me to believe in myself each time things get tough and I begin to waver on that belief.  Knowing that God created me for this purpose, having a vision of what I want in life, and then having the courage to go after it has been nothing short of transformational for me.  

I recently had this aha that changed how I look at this whole experience.  I realized that I am already living the life I wanted to live when I set out on this journey.  I get to decide what my day looks like. I focus on my self-care.  I get to see my children and grandchildren fairly often. I am serving my community in a meaningful way. I go to lunch with friends frequently, read books regularly, and in the midst of living life on my terms, I am helping others live a life of fulfillment and peace.  To help them discover and live their More is my purpose.  

I love that God gave me what I wanted while I was chasing after what I thought I needed to get what I wanted. 

Has that ever happened to you?  Have you ever been so focused on what you thought you needed to do to get what you want, that you didn’t even realize that by simply trusting in Him and taking action you’ve been given what you REALLY want?  

So what do you really want? Or, in my terminology, what is your More? Is it to be less overwhelmed with your day to day life? Or is it to have more time to travel and enjoy treasures in other parts of the world?  Maybe for you, it’s as simple as finally developing a more meaningful relationship with your children, spouse, coworker, or even God.  It really doesn’t matter, because everybody’s More is different. And it should be because God created each and every one of us uniquely because he has a special purpose and plan for each and every one of us.

So as much as I’d love to tell you how to live Your More, I can’t. I can plant seeds that may stir your soul. I can give hints by telling you what others have done to discover theirs that may inspire you, but there is only one path to the life YOUR soul is longing for. And it is locked deep inside of you. If anyone tells you what you should be doing, it’s probably their dream for you or themselves and not yours.  Guard against falling into that trap.  It will only lead to frustration and disappointment.  Further, choosing the easy route or not actually taking action will often turn out to actually be the harder route.  It too will lead to frustration, overwhelm, and a deep sense of emptiness.    

To live a life with no purpose and with a constant sense of longing for more can help us lose our focus and cause us to search in all the wrong places. Like my friend Michael Arnold, an addiction author and coach, said in a recent post on FaceBook, “We did not choose this life. We didn’t just wake up one day and say, ‘hey!, I wanna be an Alcoholic! I wanna be a junkie!’ No. That’s not how it goes…We all ended up searching for something in a bag, a bottle, a pipe, a can or a pill and by the time we realized we wouldn’t find love, belonging, or a home there, it was too late.”  

For you maybe it isn’t drugs or alcohol.  Maybe it’s shopping online, or job-hopping, or burying yourself in front of the television or computer screen. But if you are reading to this today, it’s not too late.  You can make the choice to do something different.  You can make the decision that you are no longer going to avoid that whisper in your ear and, instead, courageously step into the life your soul is longing for. The one God created you for.  

I can’t tell you what your purpose is, but I can help you discover Your More.  I can even go further and guide you to step into your More by helping you navigate all the obstacles we put in our own way of having what we really want.  So many times we are resistant to making the changes we need to make to really live a life full out the way God wants us to. We allow doubt,  fear, and our limiting beliefs to win out.  We forget that God only plants seeds of desire in our hearts for the things He also equips us to obtain.   

If this is stirring a longing in you that you can’t let go of, it is a sign that it’s your time.  God brought you here for a reason and He’s paved the path for you to step out in courage and begin living the life He created you for.  It is, after all, your life and your choice. You decide.

And you will continue to decide through the remainder of your life. I don’t believe we ever reach the end of our journey toward More until we take our last breath. My journey has taken some turns I didn’t see coming, but thankfully I was willing to take the next step when encouraged to do so.  I can honestly say that making the choice to say Yes to God and going all out for what He is calling me to has been, without a doubt, the best choice I have made in my life.

Are you ready to discover Your More? Learn more about the options I offer here.  I invite you to stop living small and say yes to God’s calling on your life.  By taking this first step, you are in no way committing to anything other than an hour of time focused completely on you and your dreams for More.   

When I think back to that stage two years ago, I had no way of knowing my practice would evolve and I would expand my message to include inviting professionals to trust God and embrace faith in their day to day lives. Nor did I know I would begin my podcast, Longing for More.  I hadn’t really put the pieces together to realize that choices are the basis of all of our lives and even though we make thousands a day, we do so in such a casual manner, that we can either use them to propel us into an amazing life or we can allow them to completely ruin our lives. 

So the bottom line is, we are living the lives that are as a result of the choices we have made along the way.  Are you living the life you would choose or did you forfeit your right to chose by avoiding the difficult decisions? Are you making choices that are consistent with your values, or are you doing what you feel you should do without regard to what God is calling you to do?  Are you ready to take control and make better choices so you, like those kids I spoke with that day in the theater and on the radio, can live your best life? There is no better time than right now to start making a change.

Thank you for reading this blog today.  I know your life is busy and every minute you have is valuable.  I appreciate that you chose to spend time with me.  If you liked this message, please leave me a message and let me know.  I would really appreciate it.  If you know of someone that needs to hear this message, please share it with them. And if this stirred you to make some changes in your life or if it inspired you to schedule a Discover Your More Breakthrough Session with me, don’t wait.  Life will continue to happen and you’ll be swept away into your normal routine in a few minutes. So do it now.  Make the choice this minute to Live Your More!

ADDED LATER:

Have you ever wondered what I mean when I talk about God whispering in your ear?  This week that happened after I had recorded the corresponding episode of my podcast for this blog post.

Initially, I got the feeling that the show wasn’t quite right. That something was missing. I decided it was just jitters and ignored it.

I had trouble sleeping, so I got up during the night to do my devotions.  One of them led me to the verse 1 Cor, 6:20 that says, Honor God with your body.  It got me to thinking about the pro-choice movement and wondering how aborting a child could be construed at honoring God with your body in any way.  

My thoughts went on to how I needed to do another episode on the fallacy that a woman has the right to choose whether she would keep or terminate a pregnancy. I thought about the few clips I’d heard recently about how if a woman would be criminalized if she miscarries and another that says no man should be allowed to legislate what a woman does with her body. The media would want you to believe that every woman is outraged that there is legislation out there to limit a woman’s right to chose an abortion.  They are wrong and it is wrong for them to try to speak for those of us who love life and will never support the worldly view that babies should be disposed of when they are an inconvenience to their mother.  

As I prayed in the showered that same morning it struck me that someone who read my title to this blog or the corresponding podcast episode would mistakenly believe that I was pro-choice, so I decided that I needed to make a change to both.

And then, after church, I did my bible study and the title was, For a Time Such as This. The same title I gave to episode 37 where I discussed abortion.

Folks, I just have to say, it is our life and we DO have the right to choose.  But we must use that privilege with grace and wisdom.  Every choice we make needs to be checked to be sure that it is in alignment with God’s word and with complete trust that He will provide.  He will make good come from every circumstance. Every single one.  

Yes, I had to make that choice years ago. I chose life. Could I have terminated the pregnancy and had an easier life?  Sure. Would that decision allowed me to move on from a failed relationship without reminders of what could have been?  Absolutely.  Am I sorry that I have had a constant reminder of that failed relationship and how the father could have loved me more? Not for one minute.  The joy I have from my son and now his young family far outweighs any negatives from that situation.  

The reality is that bad things will happen in our lives. Our choice is how we respond and how we will allow God to turn it into something amazing.  Until we stop playing God and making choices that show our lack of faith, our lives will continue to have little meaning.